Making Friends with yourself without worrying about editing

IYou know that comfy feeling when you talk with a good friend who understands you and knows about your past experiences? There’s no need to fill this friend in or catch them up and you can just flow without any worries about saying something out of context that will confuse them.

Journaling is like that friend who knows you so well they already know what you’re thinking. And you always feel better after talking with them, you feel clear about anything that was bothering you.

Journaling keeping is a good habit to get into because you can look back and see where you have been and how far you’ve come. And it can be a great practice for a writer as a daily warm-up exercise to keep the juices flowing.

A note on the difference between a diary and a journal

A diary is a place to record daily events, while a journal is more about recording personal experiences and reflections on the meaning of events and thoughts. So, I use the term journaling to cover both because you will often start out with a diary and then gradually venture into reflections about life. Journaling is creative while keeping a diary is more an exercise in describing things.

A journal is a non-judgmental place to express your feelings. And often when you write things down you become more aware of what you’re actually thinking.

Keeping a journal helps you to be honest with yourself even if you are in a situation at work or in personal life where you cannot be completely honest without dire consequences. This often relieves stress because at least you are expressing yourself and being true to yourself in private even if you can’t tell anyone else.

It doesn’t matter how boring you think it would be for someone else to read, or silly it seems, or how bad the writing is. Journaling is a chance to just write whatever flows out of you.

Journaling is a habit that makes writing flow more easily in general. If you want to become a better writer, journaling can help.

You don’t filter anything because this is just for you. Just vomit onto the page, figuratively, of course.

You’ll never get writer’s block any longer because you don’t fear writing badly, you realize it isn’t the end of the world if you write something stupid.

And sometimes you get something interesting that you can use later in an essay, story or article. But that doesn’t matter. It is the act of putting your thoughts down on paper in a little notebook or in a word document or whatever suits your writing style.

When to Journal

Whenever you like is fine or first thing in the morning or at the end of the day before bed. Try out different times and see what works best for you. Usually, I will write a little bit first thing when I wake up in the morning. This is a great time to catch dreams before they disappear and they can be very vivid and creative. By writing them down in the morning you become better at remembering your dreams.

Or if there isn’t time to write when I wake up, I will catch up later in the afternoon or evening writing for 10 or 15 minutes. Sometimes I do both the morning and evening.

Sometimes a thought worth writing down will come to me in the middle of the day and I will send it to myself by email and copy it into my journal later

Journaling gives me a sense of progress

I like to look back on my old journals from a year to 10 years back which is as far back as I have saved my journals though I started doing it regularly back in my teens. It’s interesting to see what I was thinking about, reading, watching, doing for work, studying a year or two or even five or ten years back. It helps me see how far I have come and where I am still stuck

Progress is often slow on many fronts, but if you look back at where you were last year at this time, or five years back even, it gives you a sense of proportion and progress.

Journal bits can be expanded into finished writing later

Often things that start out as observations about society or people in my journal become articles or short stories that I can use and expand upon later.

Of course, the expert at launching a writing career from his habit of journaling is David Sedaris. Many of his best stories and essays started out as journal entries that he mined later to make into finished work.

His published journal entries are a scream to listen to on audible read by the author. But he has edited them down leaving out all the dull stuff, so you just get this rich creamy sparkly story telling.

Journaling as Therapy

Keeping a journal is like having that good friend who knows you well and is a great listener.

I use journaling as a form of cheap self-therapy. I am extremely neurotic and still have a ton to work through from all that adverse childhood trauma, even as a middle aged grown up.

Sometimes I write about the past from my new perspective of the present…

Sometimes I rehash the same events and feelings I have already rehashed from other present perspectives, but I get even more insight looking back at things from my latest vantage point.

Sometimes when I am especially down or sad I will journal obsessively.

This is not healthy.

When this obsessive journaling happens, I try to cut it off at around 6 or 7 pages. But a lot of times it helps me come to terms with something I need to see about myself, or whatever situation is bothering me, and I feel better after digging through the muck a bit.

 Just make sure you don’t get stuck there!

When I ‘m feeling mentally fit, I notice that I only write a page or two per day for months on end full of happy observations and the progress I am making on my creativity, studies and work.

When a crisis hits, and I have problems to sort out is when those long journal entries start. That’s when I can really tell that something must be bothering me!

I have tried to stop journaling; I must admit it can be addictive. But I really like the practice and I never can seem to go more than a day or two without engaging in writing this freeform journal.

As far as addictions go journaling is pretty tame and doesn’t have a lot of negative side effects.

 It feels comforting to check in with myself even if it’s just an inconsequential page about what I ate the day before, who I spoke to, what I did, and how I slept.

You might just find journaling/diarying gives you comfort too.

Some cues to spark your journal entries

• Write about what you like about yourself and what you’re grateful for
• Write about how you felt when you woke up this morning
• Start a dream journal and notice if you start remembering more dreams
• Write about who you talked to the day before and any funny or interesting conversations
• Write down your goals and desires and how the progress is going
• Write about the meaning of life or your meditation practice or spiritual beliefs
• Write about your job or your plan to escape your job if you don’t like it
• Write about your friends and relationships; what is working and what isn’t
• Write down what your happy about right now, what is going well in your life
• Write about the state of the world
• Write about something you read about or heard about that interests you
• Write about your childhood. Try to remember your earliest memory and how it felt and smelled and sounded then remember another and another